There comes a time in our lives when we must face the truth. The truth of who we are and the truth of who we are becoming.
Our dance begins each morning when we awaken unto our day. We do this dance very well. We dance for our kids, we dance for our spouses, we dance for our bosses, and we dance for our parents and even the church. But when do we dance for ourselves?
We dance to entertain and please everyone around us only to become invisible to ourselves.
But I see you. I see you when you look into the mirror each morning to do your hair and face while fighting the urge to break down and cry. I see you when you put that lipstick on the same lips that so desperately wants to shout to the world "I am so tired...I'm just so tired!" Not in the physical sense, but you are tired and weary from the inside...from your deeper parts.
I see you when you realize what is happening and you regroup, square your shoulders, take a deep breath and grab your purse to walk out the door. You are on your way into the world to dance all over again. Oh, did I mention that before you left home you had gotten the kids ready, fixed breakfast, made some beds, loaded the dish washer and folded that basket of laundry? You did that dance before anyone in your house woke up this morning.
Now it's time to dance for your micro-managing, never can please boss and that noisy, jealous, aggravating co-worker who just won't shut up.
I see you when you smile while wanting to break down and cry. I see you when you work all day on a job that brings you no joy or gratification. I see you when your mouth curves out a slight grin as you imagine what it would be to own that business you've wanted to start. But I also see you when you rationalize that thought away because you believe it is only wishful thinking. I see your grin disappear along with your hope.
As you drive home, I see you plan your next dance of what to cook for dinner, how much homework you have to assist with and what time you got to go to bible study. I see you when you grab your bible for church and adjust your dance just a little because your swagger may be too much for the sisters. Because you don't want them to know that you have not had time to pray or read your bible for 5 days. And you dare not act like you have any un-answered prayers. No, this dance....the one you've learned to do so well says to everyone, including the preacher,that all is well and everything is perfect because you love God!! Right?
But I see your pain, your hurt, your disappointments, your regrets and your unhappiness with your life. I see your desire for life to be more and I see your need for more. I see that you're stuck because you've brought into the false illusion that your life has to be this way.
You've learned to dance the dance of making everyone a priority above yourself. Your illusion gives you permission to believe this is okay.
Yet, I see your dance is getting weaker, I see you miss a few steps and turns only because you are getting older and think it's too late to change the music or your dance.
I cry for you, my sister and I pray for you. Why? Because I know this dance all too well, I've dance it for years. But I also know it can be different. Life can be different and it can be for you. I am now dancing a new dance with new music and it is wonderful!! I long to have all my sisters dance with me.
I invite you to join me in this dance, but until then I will dance for you... because you have forgotten to dance for yourself.
