Are You a Superwoman Daughter?

Are you always on the go? Busy making things happen on the job, in your business, or at home? When people see you, do they think of you as a successful and powerful woman? I can recognize this kind of woman in a split second.

She is normally a very successful entrepreneur or executive on her job. She carries herself very well, she is always improving herself by taking more courses or programs, going back to school or simply reading everything she can get her hands on about improving her life. She dresses well, lives in a great house and drives a really nice car.

While externally, she does have all the markings of success, but in many cases, if you were to take peek inside, would you really see the same thing? This is a question that all successful women must ask themselves. In my program “I’m not that Woman…Your Breakthrough to Love and Money,” I call this woman the Superwoman Daughter Archetype.

The Superwoman Daughter is a Fatherless Daughter, a woman who grew up with an absentee father…a dad who was absent either physically or emotionally, or both. This woman moves at the speed of lightning, she is has an unquenchable thirst or need to be better or perfect. Who she has become through all of her work and effort is never enough. She has to do more and she has to be more. While there is nothing wrong with self improvement and self mastery, I am all for that. But when your quest for improvement comes from a place of need for acceptance and the need to be perfect, this journey can be met with lots of pain. Knowing that you are already amazing and enough, but merely wanting to embrace a bigger expansion of who you are would be a more pleasurable goal.

Most Superwoman Daughters come from a real place of need. Her relationships are
strained because she fears being controlled by anyone and her take charge attitude has cost her real happiness within her relationships. She is what I call an “Extinguisher” when it comes to her love styles and patterns, where she quickly extinguishes the passion and love right out of her relationships due to her controlling and overbearing attitude. She is controlling, secretive and even sometimes combative within her relationships. This is because she believes that if she is in control and perfect, that she is safe and they want leave or hurt her.

She earns very good mo.ney, but she finds it difficult to hold onto it, because she is a pretender when it comes to money matters. She is usually in lots of debts and has a difficult time managing her mo.ney because of the deeper feelings of shame that comes with prosperity.
The Superwoman Daughter’s daddy wounds come from her underlying belief and controlling desire that says, “I want my daddy to protect me, validate me and accept me.”

If the Superwoman Daughter doesn’t deal with her daddy wounds, she will continue to push love and money away from her life. In addition, she will continue this never ending cycle for self improvement and self mastery, while at the same time never really achieving neither.

The validation that she didn’t receive growing up can be replaced with a deep realization that she is already enough and that makes it okay to be who she is. In realizing this and downloading it to a deeper level, she will understand that she no longer has to do anything to receive real love. She simply has to “be.” Sure we all need help clearing those old beliefs that no longer serve us and replacing them with ones that do, but we can know that we are the best that we can be right now. And for some reason, in God’s mind…that is enough!! You don’t have to be anyone’s Superwoman! You are God’s chosen daughter and at the end of the day, that really is all that matters!

A Good Man is Hard to Find...Or Is He?

I often hear women say that a good man is hard to find. Then there are those who say that it’s hard to find a man who is comfortable with a powerful and successful woman. They say that men are intimidated by their success. While I can perhaps sympathize with this theory, I can’t say that I really agree.

First of all, there are very few things that a man is afraid of and a woman is normally not one of them. There are numerous of successful and powerful women who are experiencing beautiful and loving relationships with men who adore, admire and love them. But these women have discovered the hidden keys to making love work.

As I began to look a little deeper into this topic, I discovered the reason why so many powerful and successful women are having a difficult time in finding a real man.
Over the last forty years, women have made great strides in the workplace and in our careers. We have experienced as much success as our male counterparts and in some cases we have surpassed them. And we must celebrate this tremendous gain.

But somewhere during this era we have lost our sense of who we really are. We changed our clothes to look like the men in our tailored blue and black suits. We deepened our voices and tensed our faces so that we could be taken more seriously. We worked long tiring hours trying to prove ourselves and keep up the masculine pace. We wanted to be treated like one of the boys and when that didn’t happened, we cried discrimination.

In other words, we not only competed with the men, we became them. And while yes, we became what the world would deem as successful and powerful, but for many of us, it was achieved at a great cost. We gave up who we really are… our true feminine selves.

So when our “good man” showed up in our lives and didn’t stay very long, we automatically assumed that he was intimidated by our success. But in reality, he came looking for a woman (feminine energy) and what he found was himself (masculine energy), disguised as a woman.

While many women think there maybe times in their lives when they need to actualize their masculine energy in the workplace, it is important to remember that only your feminine energy and power will attract and keep a “real man.” It’s not your masculine, material power or success that a real man is seeking, it’s your true power of the feminine energy that he so desires and needs. Your masculine side has no place in your relationships.

Finding a good man is more about “being” than it is about “doing.” The masculine is active, the feminine is passive, the masculine is dynamic, and the feminine is magnetic. The masculine does while the feminine is. We want a masculine man, but we will never have one unless we become the feminine woman we were created to be.

Our real worth and our real power is not in our material power or success, it is in our feminine authentic self. A real man is not hard to find…but a real woman is.